You can also see a therapist who understands you and can help maintain a healthy mental lifestyle.
There are other similar groups where you can find individuals experiencing the same journey.
We must state that in the last couple of years, awareness about gay sides has increased. Sexual satisfaction is quite important, and sexual frustration will lead to conflict. Members of the gay community also have to treat sides with more respect. It’s about personal preference and comfort, not judgment.
Simple Example: “I’m usually side, so I’m not really into topping or bottoming.”
In short: Side = avoids penetrative sex = focuses on other sexual activities.
Where Is Side Commonly Used?
You’ll see this term mostly in:
Dating apps & profiles — Grindr, Scruff, Tinder 🏳️🌈
LGBTQ+ forums & communities 🌐
Casual conversations among friends 💬
Sexual health discussions 🏥
Tone: Casual, identity-focused, informative — not formal, but widely understood in LGBTQ+ spaces.
Examples
A: so what’s your preference? B: i’m side, just FYI 😅
A: looking for hookups or just chatting? B: i’m side, mostly chatting 💬
A: do you bottom or top? B: neither really, i’m side
A: you’re not into penetration? B: nah, side vibes only 😎
A: how do you define your sexual role? B: i’m side, open to other fun stuff though
When to Use and When Not to Use
✅ When to Use
When describing sexual role preference
In LGBTQ+ dating or hookup apps
During open, consensual conversations about sex
When sharing personal sexual identity
❌ When Not to Use
As an insult or judgmental term
In formal or professional settings
Without consent or when someone may not understand LGBTQ+ terminology
Comparison Table
Context
Example Phrase
Why It Works (or Doesn’t)
Dating App
“I’m side 🌈”
Clear, identity-focused
Friend Chat
“Same, I’m side too”
Casual, relatable
Professional
“He’s side”
Not appropriate in formal conversation
Educational
“Side refers to avoiding penetrative sex”
Informative, clear
Similar Terms or Alternatives
Term
Meaning
When to Use
Top
Prefers penetrative sex
Dating or sexual preference
Bottom
Prefers receiving
Dating or sexual preference
Versatile/Vers
Open to topping or bottoming
Dating profile or discussion
Switch
Changes role depending on partner
LGBTQ+ community conversations
Solo
Prefers no partner activity
Personal identity discussion
FAQs
1.
Is side only used in gay men’s communities? Mostly, but it can be used more broadly in LGBTQ+ spaces.
6. Can sides have safe sex discussions? Absolutely, safe sex applies to all sexual orientations and roles.
9. A Clear Guide
simple, easy-to-understand words.
Truth: acting involves understanding your partner’s moods, states and desires very well, communicating clearly, and ensuring the safety and pleasure of all involved during the act. This can sometimes lead to assumptions about their desires or preferences.
It’s crucial to remember that these perceptions are just that—perceptions.
This “flexibility” allows for a wider range of sexual activities and expressions of intimacy and potentially increases the quality of sexual life.
Communication and Compatibility
For those who identify as versatile, communicating preferences and boundaries with sexual partners becomes even more important because this conversation involves agreeing and sometimes reversing roles, within mutual consent and comfort, so that both partners’ wishes and boundaries are considered and respected.
You will be flabbergasted by the number of side gay groups on Facebook alone( a cursory search brings up two private groups with 6,800 and 1,200 members, respectively) – and how many you will come across on gay hook-up apps like Grindr, where you can now select side as a preference much like a tribe.
Now that we have talked with gay sides, it’s time to talk to you guys dating them.
In other words, you are either a top or a bottom. This is necessary to free sex from traditional, restrictive expectations and make it comfortable and enjoyable for both sexes and their partners.
Myth: tops are always dominant in all aspects of life. Truth: Being in a verse role doesn’t mean you’re unsatisfied in a monogamous relationship.
This is akin to the audience receiving the music, feeling its impact.
Stereotypical Perceptions
Now, let’s explore how these roles are often perceived by others who don’t directly experience them. It is important to respect the diversity and individual wishes of people.
No matter one’s sexual role — whether top, bottom, verse, or side — health and safety are key to every sexual experience.
This stigma can take many forms, ranging from stereotyping the role as less masculine or more “submissive” in all aspects of life, to outright discrimination and abuse. Believe it or not, understanding the gay side meaning reveals that these individuals can also have fulfilling relationships. It is, therefore, essential to protect your mental health no matter the cost.
You can do this by cutting off negative people like other gays who say or act like you aren’t really gay because you don’t like penile penetration.
However, some gay people dislike being penetrated or penetrating their partners. Truth: being verse involves flexibility and enjoyment of both roles, which emphasizes the diversity of human desires and capabilities, not confusion;
Myth: versatile people are less likely to be satisfied with monogamous relationships.
A person with the role of verse can be both the giver and receiver of penetration in sex.
Accepting Diversity
Being verse means accepting a variety of sexual roles. Instead, sides may enjoy other forms of sexual expression and intimacy, such as oral sex, mutual masturbation, kissing, and cuddling.
Non-Penetrative Intimacy
Pleasure refers to finding pleasure and satisfaction in non-penetrative sexual activities.
Is “side” a permanent label? Not necessarily; sexual roles can be fluid over time.
Conclusion:
Now you know what does side mean in gay slang? Does side mean asexual? No, sides can be sexual, just avoiding penetration.